Fathers and Daughters

July 5, 1986. Was barely four months old. I am now 27, the same age my father was in this photo.

July 5, 1986. Was barely four months old. I am now 27, the same age my father was in this photo.

16 June 2013
10:58 AM
Manila

M.–

It’s Father’s Day. Somehow it always makes me feel both happy and sad. It’s a day for a father and his daughters, and I’m sure it will be great.

But it also reminds me that my own father has lost his father, and I think about how that makes him feel, today, out of all days.

The Gift
Li-Young Lee

To pull the metal splinter from my palm
my father recited a story in a low voice.
I watched his lovely face and not the blade.
Before the story ended, he’d removed
the iron sliver I thought I’d die from.

I can’t remember the tale,
but hear his voice still, a well
of dark water, a prayer.
And I recall his hands,
two measures of tenderness
he laid against my face,
the flames of discipline
he raised above my head.

Had you entered that afternoon
you would have thought you saw a man
planting something in a boy’s palm,
a silver tear, a tiny flame.
Had you followed that boy
you would have arrived here,
where I bend over my wife’s right hand.

Look how I shave her thumbnail down
so carefully she feels no pain.
Watch as I lift the splinter out.
I was seven when my father
took my hand like this,
and I did not hold that shard
between my fingers and think,
Metal that will bury me,
christen it Little Assassin,
Ore Going Deep for My Heart.
And I did not lift up my wound and cry,
Death visited here!
I did what a child does
when he’s given something to keep.
I kissed my father.

Good morning,
T.

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