26 May 2013
We had our first staging rehearsal for the show yesterday. Waking up this morning, my body can really feel it. The movement is embedded deep in the burn in my muscles. It feels amazing.
The staging is changing my perspective of some of the songs. This one, for example. When you listen to the music, the part I’m playing seems to be “Amy” (I sing all of the “Tomorrow we’ll be free my love, we’ll never be afraid…”). Instead, in this staging, I am Darren’s guardian angel, standing at the back of the set, above everything else, calling to guide him to the light. I adore this reading of the song.
Only one more day of the world you thought you had to suffer through. You have no idea what waits ahead. Remember that time your dad followed his dreams even when no one else saw what he saw? Remember the feeling of starting something new, entirely on your own? Remember falling in love for the first time with the person who lit up your world? A new world waits for you which is greater than all of these moments. It will set the world aflame, and the world will dance.
Even suffering is impermanent, though it doesn’t feel that way during the experience. Sometimes it’s important to burn everything; start over. Never give your heart to another person to keep; invite them into your joy instead, and share your hearts together. Dance until you forget which way you were headed. Enjoy the space you are inhabiting, right now.
All things change, but you have to be able to let go of what you had held on to. Only take the steps that feel right in your heart, or else there is no point in moving. Tomorrow none of this will matter. Let go of everything you have expected, and be free — no fear.
And the world will dance. The world will dance. All will dance.
I love the way Darren looks towards me when I’m calling him at the end of that number. He just turns and sees me for the first time in the song, and walks towards me, entranced, seeing the light of no more fear. It reminds me of the Roethke poem which was the poem of the day yesterday. And it reminds me of you, and your blue period. Have faith. Have heart. Have hope.
In a Dark Time
In a dark time, the eye begins to see,
I meet my shadow in the deepening shade;
I hear my echo in the echoing wood—
A lord of nature weeping to a tree.
I live between the heron and the wren,
Beasts of the hill and serpents of the den.
What’s madness but nobility of soul
At odds with circumstance? The day’s on fire!
I know the purity of pure despair,
My shadow pinned against a sweating wall.
That place among the rocks—is it a cave,
Or winding path? The edge is what I have.